Thursday, August 26, 2010

CBN: Demons in your Halloween candy

The Christian Broadcasting Network's Kimberly Daniels wrote a blog post in 2009 claiming that Christians ought not to participate in Halloween because . . . well, because demons and witches have filled the candy with evilness.

During this period demons are assigned against those who participate in the rituals and festivities. These demons are automatically drawn to the fetishes that open doors for them to come into the lives of human beings. For example, most of the candy sold during this season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches.

The post no longer appears on CBN's site for some reason, but it can be found here, along with an editor's note that the article is indeed controversial but Ms. Daniels apparently knows what she's talking about because of "her many years of ministering to people involved in the occult."

But back to the candy. So the sweet stuff bought at the stores has already been blessed by witches--apparently the security controls at Mars, Incorporated and other candy manufacturers are quite lax. But what about candy obtained through trick-or-treating?

Curses are sent through the tricks and treats of the innocent whether they get it by going door to door or by purchasing it from the local grocery store. The demons cannot tell the difference.

Apparently demons are easy to fool.

Ms. Daniels ramps up the crazy assertions, citing bonfires, pumpkins, even the color orange as all part and parcel of Satan's plan to take over the world. Frequently she cites pagan rituals and connects them to demonic worship, as if the one had anything to do with the other, except they're both not Christian.

Which makes me wonder if she celebrates Christmas with a decorated tree, another pagan ritual co-opted by Christians.

Ms. Daniels doesn't stop there. Giving out Smarties and mini-Snickers bars on Halloween leads to demon rape:

The danger of Halloween is not in the scary things we see but in the secret, wicked, cruel activities that go on behind the scenes. These activities include:

* Sex with demons
* Orgies between animals and humans
* Animal and human sacrifices
* Sacrificing babies to shed innocent blood
* Rape and molestation of adults, children and babies

One would think with all this rape, murder, and barnyard sex going on every October 31st, local police officials would be aware of something going on. Are any rapes by demons reported to officials on November 1st? Do very many men and women strangely not show up for work after Halloween because they were murdered in a blood ritual? Do day care centers see a drop in clients during November due to parents sacrificing their babies to Satan? Ms. Daniels doesn't say.

Finally, having done her best to convince us that demons are powerful enough to hide inside the center of a Tootsie Pop and that witches release 'time-released' curses against the populace, Ms. Daniels then reassures everyone that Satan isn't all that much after all:

People who worship the devil continue to attempt to lift him up. But he has already been cast out and down! Many are blinded to this fact, but the day will come when all will know he has been defeated once and for all.

So which is it, Ms. Daniels? Is Satan mean and scary and evil, or is he weak and defeated? Are demons like the Nazis in 1939, or 2010? I need to know, because October's coming soon, and I really like Peanut M&Ms.

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